When you get married there’s an understanding that from that moment on you and your wife will share everything. In the beginning of a marriage it seems that it’s easy to want to share each and every detail of your life with your spouse. You want to be as close to them as you possibly can be and if that means airing your dirty laundry along with all the wonderful and endearing bits, you’ll do it. After all, making your wife happy is your sole purpose in life when you two first take your vows and promise to love one another forever. Things can change though and you may reach a point in your relationship where you feel your wife is pulling away from you. If your wife wants her own space, it’s important not to panic. This doesn’t have to mean the beginning of the end of your relationship with her. It may actually be the beginning of a better and stronger marriage.
Your initial and expected reaction when your wife wants her own space is to fight her tooth and nail on it. You love her so it’s natural that you don’t want her to create any distance between the two of you. You may tell her that you won’t allow her to have her own space or perhaps you’ll take the more emotionally charged route and beg her to reconsider. Anything like this will cause even more friction and damage to your already tenuous marriage. You have to respect what your wife wants and you have to consider how a brief time out from your relationship may actually help you both.
Talk to your wife in a civilized manner about what she’s feeling. You have to go into this conversation with the clear understanding that she’s going to share things that will more than likely sting you. She’s obviously not entirely brimming with happiness if she’s seeking some time away from you. Maybe she’s hasn’t gone the drastic way of asking for a separation, but if she’s expressed a desire to have more time alone that’s indicating that she has some serious thinking to do and wants to do that alone.
Listen to her carefully as she explains what she feels. Don’t interrupt and don’t jump to your own defense. She has her reasons for wanting to create some distance and you need to absorb and learn from those reasons. Perhaps she’s been feeling neglected by you or maybe it’s more about the fact that she longs for more out of life than she has. If you show her that you are supportive and want to help her, that will go a long way towards rebuilding the fractured bond between the two of you.
By granting your wife the time she needs to think things through you’ll be showing her that you respect her more than she knows. If you place your own needs aside for now it will demonstrate your serious commitment to the relationship and to making her happy. Once she feels that it will help change her mind about you and her need for space.
Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your wife to feel even more distant from you. You can make your wife fall back in love with you, all over again.
You don’t have to worry about whether your wife is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make her fall hopelessly in love with you.